Tanu Talwar
The easiest part of any relationship is to start one, but the challenge it to sustain that relationship without feeling compromised. Relationships are no child’s play, they demand the most out of you. As any relationship matures, the excitement begins to fade away, the initial symptoms of cheeks blushing and hearts racing every time "the one" calls transform into a routine affair.
Making love last forever is a tough task, as it loses the initial charm. So what makes the happily ever after? Every affair goes through the phases of good and bad & some through the extremely bad. But if you leave your partner thinking "There are other fish in the sea" you are highly mistaken, as the pattern is likely to repeat. The point is to give in your hundred percent before you judge anyone else or decide to pull the strings.
Here is a quick checklist for you to look at to make things work all over again:
1.Switch on your phone and talk it out: Every time we undergo an argument our first impulse is to ignore the person, make him/her feel unwanted and that you can do without them. More than the other person, we want to convince ourselves that we can move on. But such impulsive decisions tend to make matters worse. The key is not just to talk, but more importantly to listen. We all want to justify our actions no matter how childish they might have been, but justification sounds like mere excuses at times like these. So instead of explaining your hasty answers, just talk as to what needs to be done about it in the future. Talk about the smallest of things bothering you and be ready to hear things you don’t want to.
2. Say I Love You: Never let your partner feel that you have taken them for granted. Even a smallest gesture like remembering to ask about the slight physical pain that he /she felt the day before or sending romantic SMSes or emails can show that you care, besides making your spouse or lover smile throughout the day.
3. ‘Sorry’ isn’t the hardest word: Admitting that what you did was wrong and uncalled for is the hardest part in any relationship, be it with your friends, partner or even your parents. It’s a human instinct to explain the silliest actions. But what is really admirable is accepting that you were wrong and that it shall not happen again. A sincere "Sorry" at times has more meaning than hundred love letters put together.
4.Don’t forget to give compliments: As an affair grows older, compliments seem to be rare. Most of the time because there are no new ones to give, but the fact of the matter is one loves to be appreciated. You need to reassure your partner that you still find him/her attractive. But, please be genuine. Your partner will easily see through the act of complimenting just for the sake of it.
5. Happy Anniversary: This goes especially for all the men. It’s time to pull up your socks and remember all the important dates of your relationship like birthdays and anniversaries. Do whatever it takes - set up alarms, mark it on your calendar, even have a backup reminder like asking your buddy to remind you. It looks adorable in the beginning but take my word, forgetting it too often is an absolute turn off and no amount of convincing undoes such omissions in the world of romance. Buy a small gift or at least a card to show that you care and yes at times materialistic things do make a difference. But flowers speak the most.
6. Be civil in a fight: Though it’s said that all is fair in love and war, there is one rule you must follow and that is to keep a civil tongue especially during an argument. Don’t say things you’ll regret later. Show that you respect the other person even though there is a difference of opinion. Don’t burst your brains to say things that make matters worse. Instead take some time off and then talk.
7. Spend quality time together: Don’t just go for mundane dates; spend some quality time together like talking or doing some hobby together. Don’t just rely on movies and lunches- think big, throw in surprises to make the most of the little time together.
